A few weeks ago, I finally had the courage to put on a hijab. It was a decision that took a lot of time and thought, and by a lot of time I mean literally years. What I was most afraid of was people’s perception of me. This is why I asked a lot of hijabis about how it was when they started wearing it, what their friends said, if something had changed,… So here’s a part of my story and how it was like to become a hijabi.
1. Phase one: convincing myself
First I did my research on the real meaning of it and decided that it was something that I actually wanted to go for for the rest of my life. I thought about all the consequences that it would bring and then made the final decision. I set a date and from then on I started to wear it at home every now and then.
2. Telling others
Okay, this was coming out for me. I only did it when I was hundred per cent sure that I would wear it regardless of what they said. Up to today, this has been the hardest part of this whole process, the having to tell people that you are changing yourself on the exterior. Trying to make everyone understand that it will be still you under the headscarf. And don’t worry, they do understand, and it is not as big of a deal as it seems.
3. Getting rid of what you do not need
This part broke my shopaholic heart in pieces. Jeans and tees were my everyday outfit, short dresses and tights were my fancy option. I knew that most of the clothes I had, I would not wear anymore so I had to sell or give them. Can you hear someone sobbing in the background? That’s me when I sold my beautiful short royal blue dress that I had worn only once in my life.
4. Buying what you will need
My shopaholic heart was healed again. Using the “but-mom-I-don’t-have-hijab-clothes” excuse I went all crazy during sales: kimonos and cardis to wear with some of my tees from before, a couple of skirts just because, and scarfs of all colors and materials because “mom-I’m-still-looking-for-my-style”.
“Easy hijab tutorial for beginners”, “How to pin your hijab” or “Easy summer hijab tutorial”.
A big thanks to hijabhills and sebinaaah for showing me how to do this “flowy kind of hijab style” that’s “supereasy and takes like two seconds literally to do” because all you need to do is “like, you have this longer side and this short side and you wanna wrap it like so”.
6. And then, reality.
That’s the easiest part. When you are sure about what you are doing, nothing, keep that in mind, nothing, can make you think otherwise. You have bad days when your outfit is on point and then you wear a scarf or a cardi and it loses around 15.4% of the glam, but some other days your outfit may be pretty plain but then all of a sudden you change into a beautiful Arabian princess when you put on your hijab.
The bad thing is that you will probably stab yourself with pins around three times a day, because we are beginners and that’s how it goes.
So pretty girls out there, dress how you like and do not let society tell you who you are supposed to be. Know that your value is not defined by how you look.